Schoolless Girl

The girl having a shy expression belongs from the Mushar Community and so she can't be enrolled at school.

#OUT_OF_SCHOOL_CHILDREN 

Chandrama , the ambitious girl asks "Is it necessary to be at school if  I can struggle to learn the letters?" 

schoolless

मैं

हं, वहीं दुर, कहीं दुर

मैं खुदसे जब दुर थी

युहीं कहीं मजबुर थी,

देखा करती थी राह

मैं अपने लिए,

कास मैं, अपने पास होती

कास मैं, खुदके साथ होती

और समझलेती,

“मैं कौन हुं, मैं क्या हुं?”

मुस्कुराती, खुदकि परिचय से

लिखसक्ती मैं अपने आत्मशब्द,

और बतासक्ती सबको

“मैं कौन हुं, मै क्या हुं?”

पढ सक्ती अपनी लकिर,

लिखसक्ती अपनी तकदीर,

और सुनासक्ती

“मैं कौन हुं, मै क्या हुं?”

नजाने क्युं मै खुदसे अन्जान थी,

एकही सवाल मेरी जुवान थी,

सवालो मे डुबी जिन्दगी, मेरी पैहचान थी

बडी अजीब सि सवाल मे अट्की हुई मेरी प्राण थी।

तभि तुम आए,

मुस्कुराते,

मुझे मेरी परिचय बताने,

जिन्दगी जिनेको दो शब्द सिखाने,

जो मुझको मुझसे परिचित बनाया,

और मिठे शब्दों मे सम्झाया,

“मैं कौन हुं, मै क्या हुं।”

फिर प्यारसे सम्झाया

“न मैं सवाल हुं, और न जबाब हुं”

न मैं तकदीर कि गुलाम हुं,

न मैं किसि खिची लकिर कि पैगाम हुं,

मैं अलग हूं सबसे अलग,

मैं केवल मैं हुं,

जो अपनी लकिर खुद बनाए, मै वही धार हुं

जो सुन्दरताकी आभाष कराए, मै वही श्रींगार हुं

मै केवल मेरी आकार हुं,

मै केवल मेरी प्यार हुं,

एसे ही तुमने मुझे दिखाया

“मैं कौन हुं, मै क्या हुं।”

Purpose of Life

With each sip of tea specially, I am drowned by the question ,”What does it mean to live? What is the purpose of being alive?” May be not only me most of us have been facing the same question within our heart. The question keeps much haunting all of us, while being a bachelor student or moving ahead with a job. When we are encountered with failures the question gains much power within it. Because, we stop finding the reason behind being alive. Obviously none of us wants to fail, so we keep asking the unanswered one to us, “What is the purpose of living? What is the purpose of life?”

But when we get over all dreams and aims, the question is as simple as it should be. It would never haunt us. It’s the type of question which should be asked all the time with you. Yes! You are a human being and probably an adult or youth. You are living the era of competition and comparison. There must be any purpose behind your life which must prove your aliveness.

Getting the purpose becomes much tough when we start searching it. We search it in our work, is this the purpose for which I was born? We search it at our casual activities, the earnings, the position achieved and many more places. But once we start searching the answer the question becomes more vague and broad. It questions all the awards we have achieved, all the degrees and all those what we worked for. This accident used to be with me all the time, when I too looked for the answer.

Once I dropped my question, there was the beside me always alive with me. May be all of us can feel different purpose of their life in themselves. But I find it different. The purpose of my life is defined when I was born, actually when I was born as a human. Yes! I am I human and my purpose of life is simply practicing humanity. If I earn some money then it must be used for the activities defining humanity. If I learn something it must turn my humanity.

If I am a doctor, I must treat my patient like it’s my own wound. If I am an artist my arts must talk others heart can make them alive. I must be the reason behind the smiles and laughter. Practicing humanity as much as I can. There is a single purpose of being alive, make others alive either they make you alive or not. Once I started doing this job, I was never haunted again. My life have been the answer of all other questions. Aliveness is not about being alive, it’s all about making alive. Make your aliveness a flavor of everyone’s life. Make effort, at anything you perform, like you are performing for humankind. Don’t make aliveness a question. Let it be the answer of all. 

Special Me

In this new era of competition, life starts with comparison and ends with it. None is free from it. All of us is busy just to prove our superiority than others. We are concerned about, "I am best" in any field than others. The journey of comparison, for all of us, starts from our home as, "I am better than my cousin." Later in education where ,"I am the topper of my class" then at offices where "I got awarded as the best employee this year" and so on. In this comparison we forget to feel "my specialty." 

My grandparents ran through it, my mother went through it, so am I. Why was I sent to school ? Just because everyone goes. Why was I admitted to engineering school, Just because everyone says. What was I taught all these days? Just what everyone reads. Why didn't they taught me to be the different one? I don’t want to be at your pass list or fail list. Why don’t you create some special list for me. Why don’t you teach me, to write my own book before I read yours. I don’t want to be you, who won the race. I want to be at audience group, who never runs, just observes. I want to be your audience, who pays for seat before he sits.

It's not only mine and your problem. We all are running through the same race. We are born at different time and place, but all of us run the same race. Maybe I am senior than you, maybe you are smarter than me but we belong to the same world, the world of competition and comparison. We are different, but we want to be the same, "The best one." Hard to believe!

Why don’t you create a race, where there is no winner no looser, all is just special one. why do we need to tag everyone with best or worst, good or bad? Why don’t we try to make different tags for all or remove the all tags? Why we are taught to be the richest one? Why we are not asked, "who wants to be a beggar?" Yes! all expectation are for gaining the richest, best, most intelligent, most beautiful tags. Why don’t we are supposed to be the special one, not the most special among all.

Yes, I want to read where there is no limitation of lessons and no comparison who understood the most? Maybe I read it from the different perceptions than you. Maybe at my perception no question arises. The sun is special, the moon is special, so am I and so do you. Let's be special to feel our specialty. Neither I am you nor you are me, so why the comparison between us?

Maybe for you they may look like same, but ask them , they can make you understand they are special. They may look like same but they are special within them.

दुखनी चमार

दुखनी चमार के दुख हजार,

किनका सुनाउ, वयस्त छै संसार।

मधेसमे घर छै, नइहर बिहार

घरके टाट टुटल, बडेरी ओलार,

खानपिन आधापेट, पहिरन गवांर,

जुत्ता बनबैछै, बेचैछै पेटार,

बेटा ब्लैकिया, साईं छै कतार,

किनका सुनाउ, वयस्त छै संसार।

घर अंहार, अंगना अंहार

लालटेन किनलौं, ओहो बेकार

कहां करु नोकरी, कि करु व्यपार

शलहेश पुजली, नै सुनलखिन पुकार

नै सुने लोग, नै सनैय सरकार,

किनका सुनाउ, आखिर वयस्त छै संसार।

Am I coward?

Prescript: It's not intended to hurt anyone personally. Some people are genuinely working for social issues, It's not to hurt their feelings. It's about the issues which is growing in our society, and intended to flow a message not to use them for personal benefit.

I beg your pardon if it hurts you personally.

To know the difference between right and wrong is one of the basic idea in all human being. We all know the right path and decision should be followed. But implementing the right ideas in practical life is quite different than learning. Sometimes, we know the path we are following is wrong, but we don't dare to take the right one. Due to lack of some courage, starts cowardice that leaves a guilt in us.

Once I was back to home from a campaign named "Stop Dowry". At home, I found a girl's parents were paying dowry for her marriage with one of the boy of my family. I was asked to keep the money in locker. As my step of protest I disobeyed my family and did not keep the money but I could not raise a single word for stopping dowry at my own home. I felt guilty for the event then and now. I just decided "Dowry needs to be stopped" inside me. Since then I am haunted by a question, "Am I coward?"

After completing my bachelor's studies I worked in different sectors. Within my small professional life I traveled more. I met females working  in different sectors and at different levels, from VDC level to national levels. During the conversations, I came to know that most of the females have suffered sexual harassment during their professional carrier. Some of them were victimized physically whereas some of them were victimized by rude words of their seniors.

If I suppose those talks as literal proofs, then most of the females have the idea about the right against sexual harassment. But they don't use it. In most cases they are harassed by their office heads. If they file a case or raise a voice against it, firstly they are most probably fired from the job in case of private companies. But the scenario is more complicated at government sectors. If the girls are new comers and working on some contract, and if  they ask for leave or any support for their office works, first question from their office head is "Can you meet me alone?" It's not the issue at VDC level only. From ward levels to ministries, the conditions are same until the head is too female. Either they ask for transfers or any contract renewal, they face the same question. Some of them even resign to get out of that situation, whereas some of them ignore their question as well as their problem, whereas in worse situation some get victimized. If they raise their voice, then heads have more links and they settle it easily by relating it with their bad performance at work.

Most of the offices have the idea about women empowerment, but I have met even the persons who deliver fine lectures about these issues while holding a mike in public but when they leave the mike they ask the same question. The lecture about gender empowerment and social inclusion is a way to earn money.

I met the children too who are victimized by sexual abuse. I have seen the children working at hotels. I have seen persons charging money to uneducated people for their basic rights which needs no money according to government rules. I have seen the husbands torturing their wives. I have seen untouchability. I have seen the people who just raise the issues to earn money and make the social issue a business. But  all I could perform was sympathizing me and the victims. I could not raise the voice for them. So I get haunted by the question, "Am I coward?"